This weekend, my friend showed me a rather shocking news item: it was an interview with a woman named Donna Simpson from New Jersey who is striving to break the world record for "Fattest Woman." She is currently 600 pounds and aspires to weigh 1000 within the next two years. To make money, she runs a web site where people can watch her eating, and she has her husband and children's full approval. No, I am not kidding.
As disgusted as I am by this, though, I have to think: how much different from her am I really? Sure, I'm not exploiting myself nor am I going to such extremes to pack on the pounds, but I am aware of the damage I've done to my body. I've known all this time that I've been putting on the weight and I haven't successfully stopped it. So while we may gawk at this woman and exclaim, "But she's going to kill herself! What about her kids?" basically, I'm doing the same thing -- albeit in a more subtle manner.
I suppose I can understand her wanting to "own" her obesity, rather than being shunned by society. And I can definitely understand her wanting to just throw in the towel and eat what she wants after failing on one diet after another. What I don't get, however, is how she can want to so blatantly do something that I imagine will make her very uncomfortable. I already suffer from back and knee problems and I can't imagine what it would be like to have to deal with that, not to mention bed sores and the many other problems that accompany extreme morbid obesity.
I'm not sure if this woman's goal signifies sheer stubborness on her part -- a proverbial slap in the face to all of those obesity epidemic alarmists out there -- or if she is just trying to commit suicide. Guess I'll never know. But though I don't quite get this goal, I wish her good health and happiness ... and the deep hope that I continue to have LESS in common with someone who is destroying her body.
Showing posts with label weight loss plan. Show all posts
Showing posts with label weight loss plan. Show all posts
Monday, June 21, 2010
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Two-Month Mark
Today marks my two-month "anniversary" of my broken leg. Um, yay? This has definitely been one of the more surreal periods in my life, where I've been forced to sit back and actually slow down for a change.
Now that I think about it, this is the longest that I've been away from work since around December, 1996. That's when I had my last big college winter break. I then worked full-time the next summer, went to grad school and then began working at my current job almost immediately after I graduated. Since then, I've had many vacation, but the longest ones have been only two-weeks long. Going for 14 years without a substantial break is a looong time, though I imagine this is how it is for most of us.
That's not to say that I've been unproductive during this time off. Quite the opposite, in fact, only because I've been forcing myself to do more than just lie around all day. I've definitely gotten a lot of writing done, especially on this weight-loss blog! I've enjoyed being able to concentrate on my own writing goals without having to deal with the stress of work. I really like being able to write what I want.
But since my job will soon be in the picture again, I have to start thinking about how my weight loss plan will work into it. Obviously, I can't blame my job for making me fat, but I do think that MY habits at the job have contributed to my obesity. Having had a position where I've been sitting and stressed all day has prompted me to have some terrible eating habits over the years and I need to change that. Yes, I've always suffered from weight problems (eating disorders and otherwise), but I don't think that it's a coincidence that I became legitimately fat once I began working. It's easy to ask, "Why'd you do that?" or "Why didn't you just eat healthy foods?" but if I had a definite answer, I wouldn't be where I am today.
I feel a little embarrassed as I recall all of the food mistakes I've made over the years at work. It all started when I began as an intern in 1997 and had to do a lot of boring and thankless tasks like transcribing hours of tapes. I started bringing little bags of candy with me in order to make things less dull and those little bags turned to big bags. Then I started going across the street to the salad bar, but would never actually get salad and would get mac and cheese instead. Then I'd start sneaking extra pieces of the cakes that people would bring in for office birthdays. When I had a stressful day, I'd stop by the bakery on the way home and get a large cookie. And so on and so on.
I sometimes wish I could go back in time and stop my 20something self from doing all of these things. Hell, I sometimes wish that I could bitchslap my self from last week. But when I truly take stock of how I've eaten for the past 13 years, I realize the scope of the damage that I've done to my body. It's frightening.
As of now, I intend to return to my job when I'm able because it's the clearest thing in my future. But I'm still considering becoming a fulltime freelancer. I've been working overtime on my online writing projects and am actually seeing some results pay off -- literally! And while I do have some doubts about working from home (like being lonely), I do think it will be a different experience when I can walk again. I see myself writing for a few hours in the morning, then taking a long walk outside, then writing some more in the evening. It would be a lot of work, but I've met so many people who make a living on the Internet. And I've done pretty well for someone who mainly does online writing as a hobby.
I'm going to keep on writing then as I count down the days until Old Castie comes off (two if you're keeping track). I then have the not-so-fun task of standing on the scale so I can see what I weight. Trust me, I am NOT looking forward to this, but who knows? Maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised this time around.
Now that I think about it, this is the longest that I've been away from work since around December, 1996. That's when I had my last big college winter break. I then worked full-time the next summer, went to grad school and then began working at my current job almost immediately after I graduated. Since then, I've had many vacation, but the longest ones have been only two-weeks long. Going for 14 years without a substantial break is a looong time, though I imagine this is how it is for most of us.
That's not to say that I've been unproductive during this time off. Quite the opposite, in fact, only because I've been forcing myself to do more than just lie around all day. I've definitely gotten a lot of writing done, especially on this weight-loss blog! I've enjoyed being able to concentrate on my own writing goals without having to deal with the stress of work. I really like being able to write what I want.
But since my job will soon be in the picture again, I have to start thinking about how my weight loss plan will work into it. Obviously, I can't blame my job for making me fat, but I do think that MY habits at the job have contributed to my obesity. Having had a position where I've been sitting and stressed all day has prompted me to have some terrible eating habits over the years and I need to change that. Yes, I've always suffered from weight problems (eating disorders and otherwise), but I don't think that it's a coincidence that I became legitimately fat once I began working. It's easy to ask, "Why'd you do that?" or "Why didn't you just eat healthy foods?" but if I had a definite answer, I wouldn't be where I am today.
I feel a little embarrassed as I recall all of the food mistakes I've made over the years at work. It all started when I began as an intern in 1997 and had to do a lot of boring and thankless tasks like transcribing hours of tapes. I started bringing little bags of candy with me in order to make things less dull and those little bags turned to big bags. Then I started going across the street to the salad bar, but would never actually get salad and would get mac and cheese instead. Then I'd start sneaking extra pieces of the cakes that people would bring in for office birthdays. When I had a stressful day, I'd stop by the bakery on the way home and get a large cookie. And so on and so on.
I sometimes wish I could go back in time and stop my 20something self from doing all of these things. Hell, I sometimes wish that I could bitchslap my self from last week. But when I truly take stock of how I've eaten for the past 13 years, I realize the scope of the damage that I've done to my body. It's frightening.
As of now, I intend to return to my job when I'm able because it's the clearest thing in my future. But I'm still considering becoming a fulltime freelancer. I've been working overtime on my online writing projects and am actually seeing some results pay off -- literally! And while I do have some doubts about working from home (like being lonely), I do think it will be a different experience when I can walk again. I see myself writing for a few hours in the morning, then taking a long walk outside, then writing some more in the evening. It would be a lot of work, but I've met so many people who make a living on the Internet. And I've done pretty well for someone who mainly does online writing as a hobby.
I'm going to keep on writing then as I count down the days until Old Castie comes off (two if you're keeping track). I then have the not-so-fun task of standing on the scale so I can see what I weight. Trust me, I am NOT looking forward to this, but who knows? Maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised this time around.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Something Seems To Be Working
I worked out six days this past week, only taking a rest day on Saturday. Meanwhile, I spent a lot of time cleaning and moving around in my wheelchair, which requires me to use my arms and good leg. I've been putting in a lot of effort in building my upper body strength. And you know what? It seems to be working.
I don't know if it's because I'm getting used to only using one leg or because I am getting stronger, but over the past few days, I've had a much easier time lifting myself into a standing position without help. In the past, it would take several tries and some support from Jon for me to be able to stand up and move into my wheelchair or from the chair into the car, but now I can do this in one, swift movement. I remember that the first time I saw my orthopedist, it took three guys to help me out of my wheelchair up onto the examination table -- and I still had trouble getting up there. But when I went today, I was able to grab the table and hoist myself out of my chair without help -- a really big change.
Jon says that he can tell that my arm muscles have become more toned, but I'm not sure if he's just being nice. I can definitely feel a difference, though, when I lift myself. I feel a lot more in control, a lot more secure and a lot more balanced.
Meanwhile, I got my final hard cast today -- a bright, neon pink one that says, "I'm injured. Move the hell out of my way, fuckers!" I like it. It did hurt a bit when my doctor had to flatten out my foot to get it in the proper position, but not as much as I'd feared. And the good news is, when it comes off in three weeks, I'll be moving on to a walking boot ... and presumably walking again.
I'll admit, I'm a little nervous about the walking part. Before I broke my leg, I was having enough problems walking because of my weight and I'm afraid that I'll end up re-breaking my fibula the moment I step down on it. Still, I have three more weeks to continue losing some weight and building up my strength. Going through all of this pain has taught me that maybe I'm tougher than I give myself credit for. But trust me, with this bright, pink cast no one will stand in my way!
I don't know if it's because I'm getting used to only using one leg or because I am getting stronger, but over the past few days, I've had a much easier time lifting myself into a standing position without help. In the past, it would take several tries and some support from Jon for me to be able to stand up and move into my wheelchair or from the chair into the car, but now I can do this in one, swift movement. I remember that the first time I saw my orthopedist, it took three guys to help me out of my wheelchair up onto the examination table -- and I still had trouble getting up there. But when I went today, I was able to grab the table and hoist myself out of my chair without help -- a really big change.
Jon says that he can tell that my arm muscles have become more toned, but I'm not sure if he's just being nice. I can definitely feel a difference, though, when I lift myself. I feel a lot more in control, a lot more secure and a lot more balanced.
Meanwhile, I got my final hard cast today -- a bright, neon pink one that says, "I'm injured. Move the hell out of my way, fuckers!" I like it. It did hurt a bit when my doctor had to flatten out my foot to get it in the proper position, but not as much as I'd feared. And the good news is, when it comes off in three weeks, I'll be moving on to a walking boot ... and presumably walking again.
I'll admit, I'm a little nervous about the walking part. Before I broke my leg, I was having enough problems walking because of my weight and I'm afraid that I'll end up re-breaking my fibula the moment I step down on it. Still, I have three more weeks to continue losing some weight and building up my strength. Going through all of this pain has taught me that maybe I'm tougher than I give myself credit for. But trust me, with this bright, pink cast no one will stand in my way!
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Home, Sweet, Home
Well, I'm back from the cruise and I'm happy to say that I had a really nice time. It wasn't quite as relaxing as I'd hoped because it was cold for the Caribbean, but I still enjoyed it.
In terms of eating, I did pretty well and while I didn't lose any weight during the week, I did maintain. You can easily eat 24/7 on a cruise -- there are midnight buffets, all-night pizza stands, treats around every corner -- but I really worked hard to watch portions. I stayed away from any of these midnight offerings and stuck to three decent-sized meals -- and that was it. I drank more than usual, but having one alcoholic beverage per day wasn't too bad compared to a lot of other people on that ship.
One thing I liked about the food at dinner was that the portions were reasonable. I expected huge bowls of pasta and giant steaks, but it wasn't like that at all. Instead, the portions were moderate -- enough to fill you up, but not make you feel stuffed -- and on each menu, there were low-calorie "spa" options. Each night, I ordered a soup with vegetables (my favorites were the gazpacho and the chill asparagus soups) and then usually chicken for my main entry. After, I had some dessert, but tried to incorporate fruit into it. For instance, one night I had a small scoop of vanilla ice cream with a fruit plate. On the day that I ordered the souffle, the waiters suddenly decided to celebrate my birthday (which had been two weeks before; I guess they celebrate all February birthdays this month no matter when they are), so I also ended up with a slice of black forrest cake that I didn't ask for. But I took a few bites and then left the rest over. By the way, I've learned that I really don't like souffle.
I was also much more active on this trip than I've been in a while. Though I've been BowFlex-ing, I haven't done miles of walking. I got to do that here. It was hard -- my back hurt and I had to stop frequently, which I'm sure annoyed my travel companions (though they never complained). But we walked all around South Beach on Sunday, all over Key West on Tuesday and then explored some ruins in Cozumel on Thursday. So I got in three good days of exercise.
One other thing I'm proud of is that I got into the pool. I was a little self-conscious about wearing a bathing suit in public, but no one seemed to care about how I looked. I then wanted to actually swim, but because my center of gravity is off (this is what happens when you have a huge stomach pulling all your weight forward), going down steps and ladders often feels uncomfortable. That said, I was afraid I'd slip into the pool and hit my head. But I managed to get in and then later get out without incident. I realize this doesn't sound like a big accomplishment, but it was for me.
Now that we're home, I've been battling a horrible cold, one of the worst I've had in a long time. I've had a fever on and off and am now developing a cough. Needless to say, my eating has been spotty this week -- lots of soup, toast and low-fat frozen yogurt. The meal of a champion!
But after doing all of that walking, I'm realizing that I miss taking walks with my husband. I'm hoping that I'll feel up to taking a short one around the neighborhood this weekend.
Which brings me to my next goal: Passover. It's in a month so this is as good a time as any to plan for losing another 10 pounds. This way, I can buy myself a nice, new outfit for the holiday and won't feel too guilty if I have an extra matzoh ball...
In terms of eating, I did pretty well and while I didn't lose any weight during the week, I did maintain. You can easily eat 24/7 on a cruise -- there are midnight buffets, all-night pizza stands, treats around every corner -- but I really worked hard to watch portions. I stayed away from any of these midnight offerings and stuck to three decent-sized meals -- and that was it. I drank more than usual, but having one alcoholic beverage per day wasn't too bad compared to a lot of other people on that ship.
One thing I liked about the food at dinner was that the portions were reasonable. I expected huge bowls of pasta and giant steaks, but it wasn't like that at all. Instead, the portions were moderate -- enough to fill you up, but not make you feel stuffed -- and on each menu, there were low-calorie "spa" options. Each night, I ordered a soup with vegetables (my favorites were the gazpacho and the chill asparagus soups) and then usually chicken for my main entry. After, I had some dessert, but tried to incorporate fruit into it. For instance, one night I had a small scoop of vanilla ice cream with a fruit plate. On the day that I ordered the souffle, the waiters suddenly decided to celebrate my birthday (which had been two weeks before; I guess they celebrate all February birthdays this month no matter when they are), so I also ended up with a slice of black forrest cake that I didn't ask for. But I took a few bites and then left the rest over. By the way, I've learned that I really don't like souffle.
I was also much more active on this trip than I've been in a while. Though I've been BowFlex-ing, I haven't done miles of walking. I got to do that here. It was hard -- my back hurt and I had to stop frequently, which I'm sure annoyed my travel companions (though they never complained). But we walked all around South Beach on Sunday, all over Key West on Tuesday and then explored some ruins in Cozumel on Thursday. So I got in three good days of exercise.
One other thing I'm proud of is that I got into the pool. I was a little self-conscious about wearing a bathing suit in public, but no one seemed to care about how I looked. I then wanted to actually swim, but because my center of gravity is off (this is what happens when you have a huge stomach pulling all your weight forward), going down steps and ladders often feels uncomfortable. That said, I was afraid I'd slip into the pool and hit my head. But I managed to get in and then later get out without incident. I realize this doesn't sound like a big accomplishment, but it was for me.
Now that we're home, I've been battling a horrible cold, one of the worst I've had in a long time. I've had a fever on and off and am now developing a cough. Needless to say, my eating has been spotty this week -- lots of soup, toast and low-fat frozen yogurt. The meal of a champion!
But after doing all of that walking, I'm realizing that I miss taking walks with my husband. I'm hoping that I'll feel up to taking a short one around the neighborhood this weekend.
Which brings me to my next goal: Passover. It's in a month so this is as good a time as any to plan for losing another 10 pounds. This way, I can buy myself a nice, new outfit for the holiday and won't feel too guilty if I have an extra matzoh ball...
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Happy Birthday To Me
Yesterday, I celebrated my 36th birthday. All in all, it was a good day. They had cupcakes for me at work and then my husband and I went out for Japanese cuisine for dinner.
It was a little weird being "forced" to eat a cupcake. Lately I've been skipping them at work birthday parties, but when someone makes cupcake specifically for you, you kind of have to eat one. These even had gold sprinkles on them -- and were delicious.
Fortunately, dinner was a lot healthier. We went to a restaurant that has shabu shabu, which is basically like a hot pot or fondue. They bring a pot of water to your table, which has a burner built in; once the water comes to a boil, you add veggies and tofu, and then cook the very thin slices of meat. At the end, you eat the remains as a soup. It's healthy and delicious and a great way to get in veggies. I'm thinking that I might actually buy a shabu shabu pot so I can make it at home. Though we do have a history of getting interesting kitchen appliances and not using them. We own a wok, a cuppucino maker and a bread maker that were given to us as wedding presents (10 years ago!) and we haven't used any of those. On the other hand, we do use our food processor, large skillet and knife set so maybe the shabu shabu set would be a good purchase. It might be fun to have a shabu shabu party.
As for my workouts, they've been about the same. I know that I need to step things up and plan to after the cruise. Right now, I have a cold and barely feel like working out in the first place. But the ship will have a gym and a walking/running track, so that will be a good place to do some different activities and burn off the cruise food.
My weight loss has been going well, though. I lost another pound this week, so I am almost at my mini-goal of 12 in time for the cruise. I'd love to knock off another five by Valentine's Day. I know that sounds like a lot, but, well, let's just say that this week my uh, cycle, decided to cooperate with me so that swimming won't be an issue on the trip! That said, there might be a little bloat to be lost next week.
And with that dose of TMI, I'm off to relax and figure out a healthy meal.
It was a little weird being "forced" to eat a cupcake. Lately I've been skipping them at work birthday parties, but when someone makes cupcake specifically for you, you kind of have to eat one. These even had gold sprinkles on them -- and were delicious.
Fortunately, dinner was a lot healthier. We went to a restaurant that has shabu shabu, which is basically like a hot pot or fondue. They bring a pot of water to your table, which has a burner built in; once the water comes to a boil, you add veggies and tofu, and then cook the very thin slices of meat. At the end, you eat the remains as a soup. It's healthy and delicious and a great way to get in veggies. I'm thinking that I might actually buy a shabu shabu pot so I can make it at home. Though we do have a history of getting interesting kitchen appliances and not using them. We own a wok, a cuppucino maker and a bread maker that were given to us as wedding presents (10 years ago!) and we haven't used any of those. On the other hand, we do use our food processor, large skillet and knife set so maybe the shabu shabu set would be a good purchase. It might be fun to have a shabu shabu party.
As for my workouts, they've been about the same. I know that I need to step things up and plan to after the cruise. Right now, I have a cold and barely feel like working out in the first place. But the ship will have a gym and a walking/running track, so that will be a good place to do some different activities and burn off the cruise food.
My weight loss has been going well, though. I lost another pound this week, so I am almost at my mini-goal of 12 in time for the cruise. I'd love to knock off another five by Valentine's Day. I know that sounds like a lot, but, well, let's just say that this week my uh, cycle, decided to cooperate with me so that swimming won't be an issue on the trip! That said, there might be a little bloat to be lost next week.
And with that dose of TMI, I'm off to relax and figure out a healthy meal.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
The Best Personal Trainer In The World
I did another 20 minutes on the BowFlex tonight. Hey, don't knock it -- two days in a row is a good start! I mean, how many days do they say it takes before something becomes a habit, 21? Only 19 more days and I'm there.
What's nice is that I'm never alone when I work out ... but it's not my husband who's keeping me company. It's our cat, Maya. I swear, I think she thinks that she's my personal trainer because she's obsessed with the BowFlex. She especially loves it when we put it on an incline to do sit-ups. She'll run up and down the ramp and then try to jump up to the top of the machine (sorry, Maya, it's not happening).
If I happen to be using it in the incline position, she'll climb up around me and sit on top of my head. But if I keep the bench flat as I have for the past few nights, she'll perch on the end of the seat right next to me. Tonight as I was straining to get the last two reps out on a move, she began to meow at me. I really do believe that she was telling me, "You can do it, Mommy!"
Sometimes I envy Maya because she's in such good shape. She runs up and down our hallway just for the fun of it and can easily leap up to the top of our TV hutch. Plus, she's flexible enough to curl into a ball. I'll bet that if she were to take the Presidential Physical Fitness Test, she'd pass with flying colors (though I don't recall it including a "chasing your tail" segment). In many ways, though, my cat is an inspiration. She's at her ideal weight and thus has plenty of energy to spare. And she gets to nap whenever she wants.
I don't know if I want to sprout fur anytime soon, but it would be nice if someday I had enough energy to run someplace for no reason.
What's nice is that I'm never alone when I work out ... but it's not my husband who's keeping me company. It's our cat, Maya. I swear, I think she thinks that she's my personal trainer because she's obsessed with the BowFlex. She especially loves it when we put it on an incline to do sit-ups. She'll run up and down the ramp and then try to jump up to the top of the machine (sorry, Maya, it's not happening).
If I happen to be using it in the incline position, she'll climb up around me and sit on top of my head. But if I keep the bench flat as I have for the past few nights, she'll perch on the end of the seat right next to me. Tonight as I was straining to get the last two reps out on a move, she began to meow at me. I really do believe that she was telling me, "You can do it, Mommy!"
Sometimes I envy Maya because she's in such good shape. She runs up and down our hallway just for the fun of it and can easily leap up to the top of our TV hutch. Plus, she's flexible enough to curl into a ball. I'll bet that if she were to take the Presidential Physical Fitness Test, she'd pass with flying colors (though I don't recall it including a "chasing your tail" segment). In many ways, though, my cat is an inspiration. She's at her ideal weight and thus has plenty of energy to spare. And she gets to nap whenever she wants.
I don't know if I want to sprout fur anytime soon, but it would be nice if someday I had enough energy to run someplace for no reason.
Monday, January 4, 2010
I Think I Broke My Butt
I'm giving myself a virtual pat on the back right now (I'm not nearly flexible enough to reach all the way around) for doing 20 minutes on our BowFlex machine tonight. No, it's not much, but it's a start. And that's exactly where I want to be right now -- taking small steps, but eventually working my way up to more. I may be only doing 20 minutes right now, but I hope to soon be doing 30, and then 40, and then alternate my toning exercises with cardio.
Right now, my main goal is to strengthen my back so I've been working on exercises that focus on my shoulders, back and core muscles. The great thing about the BowFlex (and no, I'm not a spokesperson for them) is that you can do dozens of different exercises on it, so there's never a shortage of variety -- and you really do feel the workout. I'm not sure how a hard-core weight lifter would fare on the machine, but for an overweight, out-of-shape woman, it kicks butt.
The other great thing is that it's right in our living room! Once upon a time we had a fantastic little gym right around the corner from us that I went to all the time. It was in the basement of a building and didn't have a whole lot, but it had everything I wanted: elliptical machines, treadmills, stairclimbers, bikes and a weight circuit. During the two years I went there, I got into decent shape -- enough so that the other patrons noticed and I was able to do that 20-mile walk I'd mentioned yesterday. I especially loved the elliptical because I felt as if I were running, but it didn't put strain on my knees. One time, I even managed to do 90 minutes on it!
Unfortunately, the gym shut down in early 2007, due to rent issues, and I was devastated. I joined another nearby gym for around the same very inexpensive price, but it was awful. It was always crowded and they only had two ellipticals. Plus, they put so much chlorine in the pool that it was difficult to breathe during workouts. Needless to say, I wasn't inspired and didn't renew my membership. I considered joining a larger gym like New York Sports Club or Bally's, but frankly, I was nervous about being the "fat chick" amongst all of these in-shape folks. The good thing about these tiny gyms was that hardly anyone was in shape so I didn't feel uncomfortable.
That's why we decided to get the BowFlex. For a few months last year, I worked out on it religiously while training for a 10K (which I walked). Then after I finished the event, I don't know ... I just stopped. Don't ask me why; I'm not entirely sure why I keep sabotaging myself when I'm doing well. But once I stopped, the weight came back on, and as the weight came back on, it became physically more difficult for me to do my walks and work out. Basically, it turned into a vicious cycle, for which I know I'm entirely responsible.
This time, I'm not going to sign up for any events, at least not for a while, because I tend to see them as an "ending" -- that once the walk is completed, I can take a break and eat more. Instead, I want to take things gradually, focusing on the changes that I'll see in my day-to-day life. For now, being able to walk around the supermarket without being in pain will be a huge accomplishment for me.
Right now, my main goal is to strengthen my back so I've been working on exercises that focus on my shoulders, back and core muscles. The great thing about the BowFlex (and no, I'm not a spokesperson for them) is that you can do dozens of different exercises on it, so there's never a shortage of variety -- and you really do feel the workout. I'm not sure how a hard-core weight lifter would fare on the machine, but for an overweight, out-of-shape woman, it kicks butt.
The other great thing is that it's right in our living room! Once upon a time we had a fantastic little gym right around the corner from us that I went to all the time. It was in the basement of a building and didn't have a whole lot, but it had everything I wanted: elliptical machines, treadmills, stairclimbers, bikes and a weight circuit. During the two years I went there, I got into decent shape -- enough so that the other patrons noticed and I was able to do that 20-mile walk I'd mentioned yesterday. I especially loved the elliptical because I felt as if I were running, but it didn't put strain on my knees. One time, I even managed to do 90 minutes on it!
Unfortunately, the gym shut down in early 2007, due to rent issues, and I was devastated. I joined another nearby gym for around the same very inexpensive price, but it was awful. It was always crowded and they only had two ellipticals. Plus, they put so much chlorine in the pool that it was difficult to breathe during workouts. Needless to say, I wasn't inspired and didn't renew my membership. I considered joining a larger gym like New York Sports Club or Bally's, but frankly, I was nervous about being the "fat chick" amongst all of these in-shape folks. The good thing about these tiny gyms was that hardly anyone was in shape so I didn't feel uncomfortable.
That's why we decided to get the BowFlex. For a few months last year, I worked out on it religiously while training for a 10K (which I walked). Then after I finished the event, I don't know ... I just stopped. Don't ask me why; I'm not entirely sure why I keep sabotaging myself when I'm doing well. But once I stopped, the weight came back on, and as the weight came back on, it became physically more difficult for me to do my walks and work out. Basically, it turned into a vicious cycle, for which I know I'm entirely responsible.
This time, I'm not going to sign up for any events, at least not for a while, because I tend to see them as an "ending" -- that once the walk is completed, I can take a break and eat more. Instead, I want to take things gradually, focusing on the changes that I'll see in my day-to-day life. For now, being able to walk around the supermarket without being in pain will be a huge accomplishment for me.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
A New Year, A New Me?
A quick warning to anyone who's come to this blog expecting a sexy site. It's not. This is a blog following the adventures of an extremely obese woman whose thighs resemble mighty sequoias and ripple like a bowl of lime Jell-O. (Mmmm... Jell-O). Not exactly a turn on, huh? So unless you're into that sort of thing (no judgment here) and are angling to star on the next edition of MORE TO LOVE, back away.
For the rest of you wondering who on earth "Mrs. Thighs" is, allow me to introduce myself. I'm a 35-year-old writer/musician, who's happily married, has an awesome cat, a good family (I even like my in-laws!) and terrific friends. Yet when it comes to losing weight and getting into shape, I just can't seem to get my act together. In fact, this is actually my second attempt at keeping a weight-loss blog. I briefly wrote one in the fall of 2008 shortly after my in-shape father had an unexpected heart attack, and managed to lose a few pounds. But then I did what I always seem to do and suddenly stopped ... and now I'm write (sorry for the pun; couldn't resist) back where I started.
I realize it's rather cliche to begin a new weight-loss plan at the start of the new year, but there's something to be said for the plethora of diet programs offering New Year's deals. I like the idea of it being a new year and a new decade to boot. Yeah, I realize that it's just another day and that hanging up a new calendar doesn't automatically make everything shiny and new (okay, so I'm overusing the adjective "new" here), but there IS a certain energy in the air, at least here in NYC, when the new year hits. And if I'm going to begin a different lifestyle (I'm hesistant to say "diet" because that means that there's an ending and this needs to be for life), I might as well do it when I'm well-rested from a lengthy holiday break.
Besides, I don't really have a choice anymore because things have gotten pretty bad for me, as far as my weight goes. Two years ago, I completed a 20-mile charity walk, but these days I can barely walk a block without having to stop because my back and legs ache. I always feel tired. My wedding rings are getting dangerously tight. My husband and I are going on a cruise with friends in about six weeks and I'm not nearly as excited as I should be because I'm afraid that I won't have enough stamina to participate in the many excursions they offer at port.
That said, my goals for now are modest and realistic. I want to lose enough weight in the next six weeks (ideally about 12 pounds, 2 lbs. per week, but I won't object to more!) so that I can walk more comfortably and be able to have a good time on this trip. I intend to do this by following Weight Watchers and by doing low-impact workouts three times a week.
I also plan to write in this blog often so that I can document my progress (or lack thereof).
But I need to do this if I have any hope of making it to 40. So let the games begin!
For the rest of you wondering who on earth "Mrs. Thighs" is, allow me to introduce myself. I'm a 35-year-old writer/musician, who's happily married, has an awesome cat, a good family (I even like my in-laws!) and terrific friends. Yet when it comes to losing weight and getting into shape, I just can't seem to get my act together. In fact, this is actually my second attempt at keeping a weight-loss blog. I briefly wrote one in the fall of 2008 shortly after my in-shape father had an unexpected heart attack, and managed to lose a few pounds. But then I did what I always seem to do and suddenly stopped ... and now I'm write (sorry for the pun; couldn't resist) back where I started.
I realize it's rather cliche to begin a new weight-loss plan at the start of the new year, but there's something to be said for the plethora of diet programs offering New Year's deals. I like the idea of it being a new year and a new decade to boot. Yeah, I realize that it's just another day and that hanging up a new calendar doesn't automatically make everything shiny and new (okay, so I'm overusing the adjective "new" here), but there IS a certain energy in the air, at least here in NYC, when the new year hits. And if I'm going to begin a different lifestyle (I'm hesistant to say "diet" because that means that there's an ending and this needs to be for life), I might as well do it when I'm well-rested from a lengthy holiday break.
Besides, I don't really have a choice anymore because things have gotten pretty bad for me, as far as my weight goes. Two years ago, I completed a 20-mile charity walk, but these days I can barely walk a block without having to stop because my back and legs ache. I always feel tired. My wedding rings are getting dangerously tight. My husband and I are going on a cruise with friends in about six weeks and I'm not nearly as excited as I should be because I'm afraid that I won't have enough stamina to participate in the many excursions they offer at port.
That said, my goals for now are modest and realistic. I want to lose enough weight in the next six weeks (ideally about 12 pounds, 2 lbs. per week, but I won't object to more!) so that I can walk more comfortably and be able to have a good time on this trip. I intend to do this by following Weight Watchers and by doing low-impact workouts three times a week.
I also plan to write in this blog often so that I can document my progress (or lack thereof).
But I need to do this if I have any hope of making it to 40. So let the games begin!
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